The Power To Only Be Able To Move Yourself (including wheelchairs and all that) 1 meter in the entire life of the universe

The ability to police irony

The power to make a small chair appear -- one time.

The power to have extreme S and M sex with Rosie O Donnell at will, you as the submissive.

The power to know what you're going to have for dinner on any given day 10 years from now.

The ability to pull Bleach Flavored lighter fluid out of your ass every time you see a modern feminist or a Jacob Satorious video

the power to have powers (super strength,speed ,and flight) in a minute only.

The power to blink at incredibly fast speeds

The power to die

The power uncontrollably self destruct when you feel safe.

lol

the power to walk on land.

The power to spit so hard and fast that you hit yourself in the back of the head every time... and it can only be used once, because its so hard it goes trough everything...(thus hits you in the skull duh) including your skull... Moral: Remember kids! Protect, Serve and Survive, and ask your mommy and daddy why they make the sexytime... their response may be pretty interesting...

The power to see through glass walls.

The power to read minds but only when you're alone

the power to break the nib of a pencil so that its pointless

The power to die just by trying to use the word l...

The power to stop time whenever you get stabbed in the liver

The power to jerk off without using your hands

the power of running at superspeed, whenever you are sat down

The power to levitate 3cm off the ground when no one is watching

The power to walk on water, but only if its temperature is below 0° C

The ability to keep a song stuck in your head overnight

The power to die.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!