to randomly self destruct at any time

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The power to suck your own dick

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you can summon raccoons, but all they do is piss on your shit

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The power to be invisible when no one is looking at you!

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The power to have hindsight.

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The power to have 99 problems, except your dog... if she is female.

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The ability to hear fish.

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the power to turn yourself into a toaster. once,

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the power to fax people with your mind

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You know what they say! The power to make all toasters... Toast Toast!

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the power to have access to unlimited porn but your parents never leave the room

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The power of dying whenever you want.

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The power to change the temperature by 1 degree, once every leap year.

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The power of fart only in front of cheerleaders

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The power to remove all flavour from food.

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the power to slitely change how you look by smiling

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Being able to transform into anything on and off the planet, only, you have to be touching that object.

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The power to fly, but only when you touch the ground.

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the power to be a free wireless hotspot only when you are completely motionless.

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The power to convert any font to comic sans at will.

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The ability to know the current mood of your doppleganger.

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The power to realize that the alphabet does not need to be in any particular order

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The power to pee after drinking lots of water

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when riding home on my bike with music on pretenend im in a race with no1 and commentate on it .....

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!