ability to levitate using my fart...

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The power to die whenever you eat any type of food

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The power to Insult people by accidentally saying something you didn't know was offensive to them. You adopted jew

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the power to never be able to draw a straight line with a ruler

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The power to turn water into ice but only in sub zero temperatures

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X ray vision on chairs

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The power to shoot rainbows out of your dick, the rainbows can pwn anyone if you smoked crack before using this power

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The power to use a computer whenever you want, but only at libraries

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The power to become the best player in every Moral Kombat game there is. Test your Morals... TSHHH, test your morals TSHHH MORAL KOMBAT! Mortal: FEAR THE WRATH OF MORAL KAHN!

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the ability to make something that docent exists

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The power to read and immediately understand any vanity license plate from Arizona.

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The power to shrink smaller than oxygen molecules.

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to not blink for 5 seconds

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The power to teleport randomly anywhere on the planet, once every hour

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constantly flowing sexy anime hair.

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The power to drink bleach in a gatorade bottle

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the power to make a vagina taste like pizza

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The power to throw-up purple cheese curds on command, but you are also allergic to purple cheese curds?

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The power to make high definition photo a hammer (with a red comfortable heated handle with LED flashing lights) appear out of thin air. (Oh, and on a 8"x11" piece of paper of course).

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The ability to turn cement into pudding

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The power to become a forensic paranoiac raving lunatic at will... HEY! YOU! Why are you gonna give my comment a thumbs down eh? AND WHY A THUMBS UP? Are you gonna hack my account and kill my family? OH YEAH! OH YEAH? I AM GONNA KILL THEM MYSELF JUST TO TAKE IT AWAY FROM YOU! BAHAHAHAHA!

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???q? ?o?? sp??oq??? ?nq ????u o? ???l?q? ???

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The power to jump 3% higher than the average human,

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The ability to never get your comments featured on jacksfilms YIAY series

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!