The power to expel a single spaghetti from any limb randomly

The power to eat food, but as you eat the food you turn into a giant green monster and have to terrorize Japan for the rest of your life. As a result of you terrorizing Japan, McDonald's comes out with monster toys and Universal does a children's movie about how monsters can be cute cuddly creatures in order to calm down those who are having nightmares at night because of your horrific actions in Japan. While in Japan though a mad scientist creates a unmosterification ray gun that heals you. Then you decide you have to go on an all liquid diet so over the course of many years you become impervious to drowning, in that time you also develop the ability to speak with sea animals with a sonar type ability. Thus rendering you as Aquaman the most useless superhero ever.

The power to telepathically fold paper.

The power to turn yourslef into a suicide bomber just as he blows himself up

Having a bullet-proof skeleton.

The power to have 50%-78% water in your body

The power to have a very keen sense of smell 24/7 but only when a fart is present

The power to correctly guess how old shag rugs are

the power to beathe

The Power to sit down only on chair made of knives.

The power to shoot rainbows out of your dick, the rainbows can pwn anyone if you smoked crack before using this power

The power to use a computer whenever you want, but only at libraries

The power to have knowledge of your power.

The power to become the best player in every Moral Kombat game there is. Test your Morals... TSHHH, test your morals TSHHH MORAL KOMBAT! Mortal: FEAR THE WRATH OF MORAL KAHN!

The power to grow nipples all over your body at will

The power to transform yourself into a perfect copy of your mother.

The power to cause slow people in front of you in the corridor to walk 3% faster

The power to not be Chuck Norris.

The power to be an exceedingly homosexual man and be constantly surrounded by sexy women.

The Power To Only Get Horny Around Your Grandmother

the power to read your own mind the power of 75% levitation the power of turning into a juicy pork chop in the presence of a lion the power to believe it is butter the power to turn into a blender once and never change back the power to cry acid the power of turning highly visable while trying to sneak the power to speak, sneeze and cough really loudly and annoyingly the power to teleport half of your body the power to age extremely fast the power to have the patience to write this the power to read all of these d pwer 2 rite stupeedlee the power to thumbs down this (it also makes you look stupid) the power to only speek in sarcasm the power to see the past (not the future) emit eht lla sdrawkcab etirw ot rewop eht

The power to strangle yourself to death

The power to throw-up purple cheese curds on command, but you are also allergic to purple cheese curds?

The power to stick your head up your ass

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!