The power to know who farted at any time.

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The power to die everytime you pee

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the power to shit your pants uncontrollably when your mom calls your name

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The power to be a really good bowler, but only with a bowling ball that has the skull of your dead father embedded in its center.

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The power to know exactly how events would have turned out, had the last event gone differently

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the power to make people disappear but they reappear 5 seconds later 6 centimetres from where they were standing when you made them disappear

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The power to survive at absolute zero

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The power to fly but you can't go ten feet above ground.

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The power to tolerate the excistance of Richard Davison

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the power to be able to light yourself on fire yet not be immune to it

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The power to go in jail every time you are alone.

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The power to see through things that are invisible.

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The power to transform into Osama whenever someone sees you.

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Ability to be Stephen Hawking's stunt double.

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The power to read everything 2 seconds faster than usual

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The power to whenever you watch tv you can only watch commercials.

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The ability to transform into anything... gradually, over the course of a week.

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The ability to scream and whisper at the same time.

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The power to summon huge snowstorms, but only on the weekend.

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The power to make fires bigger, but cant control them

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The power to eat food, but as you eat the food you turn into a giant green monster and have to terrorize Japan for the rest of your life. As a result of you terrorizing Japan, McDonald's comes out with monster toys and Universal does a children's movie about how monsters can be cute cuddly creatures in order to calm down those who are having nightmares at night because of your horrific actions in Japan. While in Japan though a mad scientist creates a unmosterification ray gun that heals you. Then you decide you have to go on an all liquid diet so over the course of many years you become impervious to drowning, in that time you also develop the ability to speak with sea animals with a sonar type ability. Thus rendering you as Aquaman the most useless superhero ever.

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The power to hear what is happening to objects (such as a bed).

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The power to turn into wood once you go inside a wood chipper.

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The power to fly, but only in microgravity.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!