The power to teleport yourself into a cell of a maximum security prison made from proto-adamantium, Damascus steel & Supermanium.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

The power to type useless powers that no one's ever gonna read.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

The power of drawing perfects dog dicks, but not dogs at all.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

The ability to levitate birds

thumb_up thumb_down +50

The power to eat the booty like a poor person's groceries

thumb_up thumb_down +50

The power to fly only one inch off the ground

thumb_up thumb_down +44

The power to read the minds of rocks

thumb_up thumb_down +32

The power to travel in time for 2 seconds

thumb_up thumb_down +22

The ability to rectify health and safety concerns, using a sword.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

The ability to perpetually masturbate.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

The power to actually care what these people are writing.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

The power to blink a nano second slower

thumb_up thumb_down -32

The power to make people believe it wasn't' you who just farted

thumb_up thumb_down -42

The power to listen to justin beiber

thumb_up thumb_down -110

the power to see 3 seconds into the past.

thumb_up thumb_down +147

The ability to have any destructive power... As long as you use it on babies or old people.

thumb_up thumb_down +137

The power to kill anything you touch, but only when touching adorable puppies.

thumb_up thumb_down +109

To grow your fingernails out and in very quickly.

thumb_up thumb_down +107

the power to shit with your mouth

thumb_up thumb_down +97

The ability to be completely bullet-proof as long as a bullet never hits you.

thumb_up thumb_down +89

The power to never be surprised when the toaster goes off.

thumb_up thumb_down +85

The power of walk on the water if it is frozen.

thumb_up thumb_down +85

the power of not being able to feel pain during constipation

thumb_up thumb_down +83

The ability to avoid work when connected to the internet. Thanks, by the way.

thumb_up thumb_down +79

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!