The ability to innoculate against all non-existent diseases

thumb_up thumb_down +97

Having a bullet-proof skeleton.

thumb_up thumb_down +95

The power to turn Wii controllers into broken TV sets.

thumb_up thumb_down +95

Supreme pre-mature ejaculation.

thumb_up thumb_down +91

The power to implode when you have pee and you can't stop

thumb_up thumb_down +89

The power to grow your fingernails at 1.5% times the average speed, provided you contribute three hours a day to meditation.

thumb_up thumb_down +87

The power to turn delicious and tasteful food into useless brown mush.

thumb_up thumb_down +87

the power to crap out bite-sized super heroes.

thumb_up thumb_down +85

The power to discern the breed of a cat by the taste of its poop.

thumb_up thumb_down +85

the power to fly but only 5 feet off the ground and at walking speed.

thumb_up thumb_down +83

The power of making your tits smaller

thumb_up thumb_down +83

the ability to eject a little steam cloud from your penis every time you finish peeing.

thumb_up thumb_down +81

The ability to change your weight

thumb_up thumb_down +81

The power to have tastebuds inside your ass.

thumb_up thumb_down +79

the power to make a fart that kills people when no one is around you

thumb_up thumb_down +73

The power to see through things but you can't turn it off once turned on.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

The power to get laid by your right hand.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

the power to freeze people only when it's cold

thumb_up thumb_down +59

The power to ejaculate out of your ears once daily

thumb_up thumb_down +55

the power to like Liam Brudenell, That is pointless

thumb_up thumb_down +47

shit and piss at the same time

thumb_up thumb_down +45

The power to quote Castlevania quotes all day... yelling them out on the streets! Moral: WHAT IS A MAN! People look at me and laugh... and moral man struts past... he has never been so awesome before... They see me rollin... they laughing... they lovin... and I hope nobody calls the ambulance because I am crazy... in love... I can see it in your eyes... I can see it in your smiiileeee...

thumb_up thumb_down +29

The power to count to infinity.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

The power to smell farts from miles away

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!