The power to tell when someone last masturbated, but only by shaking their hand.

thumb_up thumb_down +133

Shoppers today in the mattress department we just started a great promotion.

thumb_up thumb_down +131

The power to propel urine at the top speed of the animal you most recently thought of.

thumb_up thumb_down +131

The power to use successfuly Splash Attack irl.

thumb_up thumb_down +123

the power to undress yourself at a slower rate then others

thumb_up thumb_down +123

The power to be invincible to every thing but fire water tornadoes bullets explosions guns knifes blades swords grenades sticks pointy objects disease infections sicknesses flu illness natural disasters accidents vehicles trucks electricity meteors bombs rockets drug addiction peer pressure starvation tiredness torture pain monkeys radiation.

thumb_up thumb_down +123

The ability to teleport to the Taj Mahal whenever you want ONLY the Taj Mahal

thumb_up thumb_down +121

The power to teleport small dogs

thumb_up thumb_down +119

The ability to teleport 0.00000000000000007 seconds in the past

thumb_up thumb_down +113

The power to kill anyone with your mind, In your imagination.

thumb_up thumb_down +109

power to be heard only when there are ideas worth listening to

thumb_up thumb_down +109

The ability to float sideways very slowly

thumb_up thumb_down +109

the ability to die but to reappear as a strange families pet turkey

thumb_up thumb_down +105

The power to teleport homeless people to the sun

thumb_up thumb_down +105

The astounding ability to lay eggs instead of give birth.

thumb_up thumb_down +99

The ability to fly up 3feet travel to travel a meter forwards

thumb_up thumb_down +99

The power to instantly tun any kind of meat into hotdogs.

thumb_up thumb_down +97

The power to defuse bombs without touching them, but you have to be within 3 inches of it.

thumb_up thumb_down +95

The ability to write a pointless superpower, which was posted earlier without having read it.

thumb_up thumb_down +95

The power to open doors that are already open

thumb_up thumb_down +95

the power to detect when there is oxygen near you

thumb_up thumb_down +93

The power to ride a unicorn without a horn that can't fly.

thumb_up thumb_down +91

The Ability to make everybody hate YOU!

thumb_up thumb_down +91

The power to fell pain 3 minutes after it happens.

thumb_up thumb_down +89

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!