The power to glow while under the sun

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The power to say something only when you have a mouth

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The power to have a V8

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the power to remove the white seeds from a watermelon over the course of two months.

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The power to communicate with applesauce.

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the power to create bad superpowers

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The power to see thru windows and turn door knobs.

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The power to control dodos

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The power to write sentences without periods Get it? A POINTLESS super power? LAWL

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The power to breath at will.

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the power to get a 100" erection but only over your dead greatgrandma

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the power to make ur fingernails fall and the go into a coma when someone says hello.

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The power to delete the "missing a finger" comment on shitbrix.com.

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I HAVE A TINY PINGAS! (Penis) Moral: Ladyfriend here daring me to post this here, PFF! Is that even a dare? I got balls of steel! Oh, and I should totally ask my doctor if she can give me something that helps me unwind after multiple female company, or at least they are daring me all to type that pff! Im not even good looking... And noooooo, nobody dared me to type that, they want todeeeeeeeeeellllllllteeeeeeeeee tht BUTI SHALLOOOWWWWWWINSSSSSSSS

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The power to be hungry without eating a Snickers bar.

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The power to Remove 23% of Lint from your clothing Using only A Lint roller.

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The ability to ruin ipods by simply listening to a song

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the power to get free airplane flights but only to the place you are in

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The power to get a boner when you're horny.

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The power to eat food, but as you eat the food you turn into a giant green monster and have to terrorize Japan for the rest of your life. As a result of you terrorizing Japan, McDonald's comes out with monster toys and Universal does a chi...ldren's movie about how monsters can be cute cuddly creatures in order to calm down those who are having nightmares at night because of your horrific actions in Japan. While in Japan though a mad scientist creates a unmosterification ray gun that heals you. Then you decide you have to go on an all liquid diet so over the course of many years you become impervious to drowning, in that time you also develop the ability to speak with sea animals with a sonar type ability. Thus rendering you as Aquaman the most useless superhero ever.

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to die when you are happy

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Basic telekinesis, limited to moving your body parts with your mind.

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The power to wake up to surprise sex in the morning... in prision.

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The power to use internet explorer at a moderate working speed

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!