The power to run in slow motion and jumping around.

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The power to make police pull over the black guy next to you (in your car) and anytime this happens you get the ticket not him

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The power to have explosive diarrhea after eating Chipotle

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the power to twerk as good as miley cyrus

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The ability to speak to deaf caterpillers

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The power to cure cancer, but only on corpses

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The power to have horrible spelling while trying to write an ad for the pointless superpowers app.

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The power to propel urine at the top speed of the animal you most recently thought of.

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The power to shoot spaghetti out of your finger tips.

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The ability to go on cheeseburger.com whenever you want, but only when the teacher is in the room

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the power to summon endless number of girls ages 6 to 13 but only if you 47 years old

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Stop clapping

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The power to read your own mind!

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The ability to turn invisible but only when you're playing a trombone.

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The power to greatly enlarge your penis only if you are presenting.

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The power to be fireproof under water

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The power to Master Bait, endlessly without getting satisfaction. Moral: A little less conversation, a little more action please...

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EntirelyTooManyNapkins Man

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The power to read 1.2x faster than the average person.

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The power to sound like a 12 year old while playing call of duty

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The Ability to make everybody hate YOU!

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The power to get up early for school, only on the weekends

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The power to eat 2 hotdogs in the same bun

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The power to finger some one in the arse so they shit them self.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!