the power to move something right next to you

The power to die.

The power to grow hair on your eyeballs

The power to summon huge snowstorms, but only on the weekend.

the power to teleport yourself to a volcano core

The power to fly while masturbating.

The power to vomit a thoroughly blended mix of pickles, cheese, onions, caramel, lead paint, octopi, boiling water, vinyl, super glue, hot sulfur froth, and hand sanitizer.

ability to run very fast without stopping forever

The power to have everyone in the universe believe you are dead. Including you.

The power to turn the tv off from 0.00000000001 inches away, with your mind, but it takes half an hour to actually turn off. This superpower runs out whenever you come within a mile of a tv.

The power to think of a pointless superpower

mime-o-moid. The power to pretend to be stuck in a box, walk a dog and climb a rope.

The power to make your nose blink.

The power to become tired at will but never sleep.

The ability to make food disappear from a plate by putting it in your body.

The ability to fly 6 inches off the ground

The power to throw crazed badgers 3% faster than the average human. However, you would have to find the badgers, and they would have to be angry. The power does not affect your aim, only your speed.

The power to walk thru mud and not leave a footprint

The power to when you get scared, you fart.

Immunity to everything, except diseases that cause death.

The ability to fart pee.

The ability to have X-Ray vision that only works on glass.

Hearing so good a raindrop will deafen you

The power to make people believe it wasn't' you who just farted

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!