the power to teleport yourself to a volcano core

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The power to vomit a thoroughly blended mix of pickles, cheese, onions, caramel, lead paint, octopi, boiling water, vinyl, super glue, hot sulfur froth, and hand sanitizer.

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The power to have everyone in the universe believe you are dead. Including you.

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ability to run very fast without stopping forever

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The power to turn the tv off from 0.00000000001 inches away, with your mind, but it takes half an hour to actually turn off. This superpower runs out whenever you come within a mile of a tv.

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The power to think of a pointless superpower

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The power to make your nose blink.

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The ability to make food disappear from a plate by putting it in your body.

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The power to walk thru mud and not leave a footprint

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The power to when you get scared, you fart.

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Immunity to everything, except diseases that cause death.

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The ability to fart pee.

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The ability to have X-Ray vision that only works on glass.

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The power to make people believe it wasn't' you who just farted

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The power to be unconscious during Calculus class.

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The ability to levitate but only if you're touching the ground

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The power to press the "I have read and agree with the terms on service -" button without actually reading them.

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The ability to go on cheeseburger.com whenever you want, but only when the teacher is in the room

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The ability to turn into a were-turtle when exposed to the full moon.

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The power to have any power you want, but only if you are touching a nine pound diamond, standing in a pool of gold, and stabbing yourself in your pineal gland, the smallest muscle in your body.

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The power to look really cool when sitting in a chair when nobody's looking at you

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The power to make ice sculptures out of marble

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The power to undress using your mind...but only when in the presense of a rapist

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The power to type so damn many superpowers that your head is spinning, and wanting to keep doing it because you really like this thing, its so... fulfilling... Moral: What can I say, people fight so much over who is right, and go to war just to prove their points... I LOVE POINTLESSITTY! (Pointlessitty, is not a typo, its a shakespearean slip you ignoramoron) Fun fact: A shakesperean is by itself a grammatically incorrect word, but not a typo simply because I used it on purpose... wow thats crazy... agree? Then thumb me DOWN NOW!

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!