A follow up to the next comment bellow... (the irony) is that you also get the powers to type YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! And other quotes at random points... I got these powers... you do not believe me? YOU THINK YOU HAVE THAT LUXURY? YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! Moral: GUANTANAMO BAY CUBA! Just making conversation... (throws random small dog in the trash container) last part was just me its not like you get the power to do what he does in movies :P

The power too shot seeds IF you are not alive

The power to kill yourself if there is a bullet in your heart, brain, and liver all at the same time

The power to poo in the toilet

The power to believe you are being hilarious... get it? Eh? ;) ;) Ahahaha XD Yeah, thats funny eh? Yeah I know, how does he do that xD, I wish I knew hahaha HOHOHO! I should be a comedian!

The power to never stop shitting.

the power to be the best at a game but nobody knows you

The power to close your eyes and drift off to a state of unconsciousness.

The ability to teleport out of danger randomly, whenever you do you are handcuff at the hands and ancles naked. You also don't get to choose where you end up.

The power to spend more than £10 at a starbucks

The power to finish work instantly but only after the deadline

the power to convince girls to have sex with you, but you don't have a cock

The power to have sex whenever you want, but only with Rosie O'Donnell

The power of making your eyeballs bigger but without any significant improvement in your sight.

The ability to make slightly off colored flags of any country that can not be used in combat.

The power to be toilet paper and never run out of paper but still keep your sense of taste

The power to finish homework that dosen't even get A's

The power to temporarily give yourself a random STD.

The power to see through windows

The power to make dad jokes.

The power to turn any department store into a Londis.

The abilty to jump 50m in the air without the abilty to survive long falls

The power to be a Fox News anchor with something actually coherent to say.

The superpower to speak from to anybody's asshole.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!