The power to be yourself.

You can have anything you don't want at any time.

Being able to create duplicates of yourself, however you must give birth to these duplicates out of your anus (incredibly painful and its highly likely that you will pass out from the pain). And to disappear they must claw their way back up.

The Ability to remove your penis and grow a new one. the old penis will grow roots and become a penis tree. A lovely addition to any home.

the ability to walk barefooted on top of legos without pain but only as long as you don't know they're legos

The power to stretch infinitely, but you cant return to your normal state.

Useless super power? A shitbag (my former boss, now my employee, funny story really) at work heard I have diabetuus and started lecturing me in the meeting room in front off everybody as how sugar was bad, and that I should not drink artificial sugar and sodas and... ...Anyway he refused to shut up and had (back then) the guts to point at me and shout "SHUT UP I AM LECTURING YOU!" And continued "avoid juice and whatnot... ...Then I had enough bullshit for one day, slammed him against the wall and shouted: ITS DIABETES TYPE ONE QUEERFAG! I WAS BORN WITH IT ITS CALLED BREATHMINTS MOTHERFUKKER! Point: He called the cops and made up a lot of lies about me such as: "rhe one where I made him FEEL afraid for his life etc" which my former coleagues comfirmed where not true at all. then he called his boss in order to get me fired, his boss contacted me, we spoke, my former boss/"lecturer" got demoted, now two years later I got promoted to his former position... ...Before I left work yesterday, I grabbed my insuline pen and stuck it in my tigh and asked him/it:remember about that time you lectured me about diabetes?"... Funny story really, you should all have been there.

The power to touch the ground using only your feet

The power to melt chocolate at room temperature.

The Power of Super Speed only when you climb a ladder

the power to breathe under water but only when yourout of water

The power to transform into a vegetable, but only one way

the power to float one atom above the ground

The power to not be affected by bullets unless you are shot with one by a gun

The power to make police pull over the black guy next to you (in your car) and anytime this happens you get the ticket not him

The power to thumb ME down! Moral: Never gonna give you up, never gonna let you do-own...

The power to produce 5 times the normal amount of ball sweat.

The power to stop time but if you do so you will also stop.

The power to remember everything then forgetting it 10 seconds later.

the power to shit liquidly

the power to turn into amy rose

the power to fart every time you blink

A healing punch

The power to understand a joke 30 seconds later after the last person in the group did it.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!