the power to remove the white seeds from a watermelon over the course of two months.

thumb_up thumb_down +103

The power to make it so legions of turtles submerge from the world seas in order to fight for the death in your name to save your ass whenever you are in trouble. Moral: Uh thanks for coming turtles... yeah I remember when I needed you 20 years ago... But thanks really...

thumb_up thumb_down +101

The power to teleport 1 inch but you can only do that once a week and it waists your energy for the entire week.

thumb_up thumb_down +101

the power to sneeze cum

thumb_up thumb_down +97

The power to write sentences without periods Get it? A POINTLESS super power? LAWL

thumb_up thumb_down +93

The power to see out of the back of your head but never the front

thumb_up thumb_down +89

The power to not move but your always happy.

thumb_up thumb_down +85

The ability to not fart, but only while you are alone

thumb_up thumb_down +83

The power to walk through floors and fall through walls

thumb_up thumb_down +83

The power to throw away and break your wine/blood glass away before yelling HAVE AT THY! At the comment below (below this one duh, you see the other brown box? Yeah that one genius) Moral: Yeah yeah, you dont get it, but its awesome because its a MISERABLE PILE OF SECRETS!

thumb_up thumb_down +83

the power to inhale and exhale air

thumb_up thumb_down +83

the power to be able to blow air

thumb_up thumb_down +83

The ability to get out of bed in a Monday morning even though you don't want to

thumb_up thumb_down +81

The power to laugh at Tyler Perry's House of Payne.

thumb_up thumb_down +81

The ability to steal, without getting caught, other people's pocket lint.

thumb_up thumb_down +81

The ability to ruin ipods by simply listening to a song

thumb_up thumb_down +77

The ability to read Captch codes perfectly but not being able to type them correctly

thumb_up thumb_down +77

the power to get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down +75

The power to cry whole bananas grown in Brazil.

thumb_up thumb_down +75

The power to speak parseltongue except when you're around snakes.

thumb_up thumb_down +75

The power to jump faster.

thumb_up thumb_down +67

Writing "because moral man loves you" Moral: I am far too antisocial to love everyone, I mean the more love for me the better... so I can give a lot to my girlfriend too... love you baby! (my girlfriend duh) Moral 2: Someday ill tell her that I type this comments, and if you thumb this up, she will find out I declared my love here too... aww... love the man that does not love you... for love! Me: Huh? My head is spinning... and if yours is too, then thumb this comment up.

thumb_up thumb_down +67

The power to not get crushed, only if you're in contact with something.

thumb_up thumb_down +65

The power to vote for Osama Bin Laden for president. Moral: And to believe it could still be worse...

thumb_up thumb_down +65

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!