the ability to have children fully grown

thumb_up thumb_down -32

The power to shapeshift into a frog, but not the power to turn back

thumb_up thumb_down -40

The ability to understand women!!

thumb_up thumb_down +143

The ability to yell through your nose

thumb_up thumb_down +137

The power to see through a hole

thumb_up thumb_down +133

xray vision , but you must close your eyes

thumb_up thumb_down +105

The power to perform stan up comedy whilst sitting down

thumb_up thumb_down +99

The power to start gasping for air seconds after touching a keyb... then to die from hyperventilation seconds after using your mou...

thumb_up thumb_down +99

The power to be a dick.

thumb_up thumb_down +91

The Power Hear Everything that happens within the closest McDonald's

thumb_up thumb_down +87

The power to understand this: Alucard: Father! I will stand against you! Dracula: Then it is time to kill your weak human side and join me in REMAKING THIS WORLD! (battle ensues Dracula takes a hell of a beating) Dracula: AAAAAAAARGHHHHHH! Heh... sarcasm... What is a man... if he gains the world, but loses his soul... limps away... Mark 8:36 I believe... Alucard: Father! I did not wish for you to die! Dracula: Uh I lost a sole, and the world is mine, already... Alucard: Well then lets keep fighting. Moral: Richter: YOU STEAL MENS SOLES! Dracula: The same could be said about every shoe shopper... Me: You are not gonna get this one, but if Dracula STEAL MENS SOULS! Then why would he have a soul to begin with? Its confusing... and the power to understand this is meaningless... BUT ENOUGH TALK YOU MISERABLE LITTLE PILE OF SECRETS! HAVE AT THY!

thumb_up thumb_down +85

The power to ejaculate only when you're greeting someone

thumb_up thumb_down +77

The power to shoot socks out of your hands.

thumb_up thumb_down +75

The power to become extremely good at licking pussy... cats.

thumb_up thumb_down +73

The ability to type without having to use the shift key.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

The power to talk to animals and have them partially understand you.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

the power to fly for a second

thumb_up thumb_down +57

The ability to speak all languages ever recorded in history, but cannot speak without using at least 10 of them simultaneously.

thumb_up thumb_down +57

The power to make dogs quit sniffing you.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

The power to read bladders. You would always know when someone has to pee.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

The power to see at night but only black objects.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

the power to get really mad.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

The power of reincarnate but have absolutely no memory of your previous lives.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

The power to walk through doors, then open it.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!