The power to commit suicide.

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The power to explode by yelling ALLAH FORGIVE MEEEEEEEEEE! (Bonus: you always appear on Al Jazeera when you blow yourself up)

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Expert level knowledge of the Kardashian lore

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The power to only be able to mind control goldfish one at a time

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The power to transform money into cow eating chickens

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The power to be on facebook and do homework at the same time

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the power to watch reruns of NBC's "Joey" in your head

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the power to only eat sugar, but not things that tastes sweet.

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The power to control time, space and rule the universe... But only when you are dreaming.

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The power to make any single girl instantly reach for her Mace.

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The power to chuck dead babies from a bridge

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Liam Brudenell

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the power to read 9999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 books every second

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The power to see extremely far, and to see trough everything except yourself. Congrats you are stuck with seeing your own ass wherever you go for the rest of your life. Yeh i am moral man whatevs...

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The power to be able to tie your shoe halfway, by using your mind.

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Swiss army teeth.

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having the ability to not piss yourself when your on the toilet.

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The power to cease to exist at birth!

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the ability to turn coke into pepsi

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Ability to make your eyes switch sockets

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the ability to drink coffee without burning your tongue.

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The ability to fart inwards.

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The power to shoot 4-7 flower petals out? of your wrist every ten days.

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The power to have a black president

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!