The power to have wood when you wake up.

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The power to fart really smelly :P

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The power to levitate birds with your mind.

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The ability to lactate air.

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the ability to grow and shrink... only inside buildings.

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The power to have your piss turn to solid gold before it exits you.

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The power to turn a dollar into three quarters.

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The ability to jizz uncontrollably in your pants randomly during the day

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the ability to time travel 5 minutes into the past this power recharges every 5 minutes

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The power to remember every moment of your suckish life

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To point out that the superpower below was the power to type partially invisible sentences. Moral: I did not realize that most of you would find that too hard to understand, but thumb me up if you did... And thumb me up if you did not... (watches comment disappear in the minus 10000 comments section) Damn flashes of the future... Heck! Just thumb it up if you like it because you liked it... and leave it be if you do not... or else I will use my most evil superpower in the world: Ignorance... aka I will ignore it.

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captain obvious

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the power to do sit on your couch all day

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The power to talk to animals and plants, but only to have really boring conversations with them.

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The power to change the shape of any object at will

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The ability to see through blind peoples eyes

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The power of x-ray vision only when you are naked in public. More people the stronger it is.

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The power to speed up wallmart lines; only if your're not in it.

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The power to give a **** about bigfoot

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The power to turn any plasma tv into ice with 3 times the mass

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The power to hear people's thoughts when you fap

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The power to never be cold, but only when it is above 80 degrees.

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The power to make any girl hate you

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The power to accidentally stumble upon huge, life-changing GoT spoilers on the internet

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!