The power to throw your crotch as a powerful one time grenade.

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The power to be able to get up 11.5% quicker than the average perosn

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The ability to fly but, if you use it, birds start flocking around you and shitting on you.

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The power to enjoy eating potatoes slightly more

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See the answers to any question inside your head while suffering from severe dyslexia.

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The power to only drink liquids

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The ability to morph into someone else's left butt cheek

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The power to know when a painting is crooked but it only works if the painting is noticeably crooked.

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A power to turn into an ant, but only one Time.

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power to take a dump through your front (if you know what i mean)

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The power to read the bible, and then learn hypnosis, and look at the bible again... Moral: And they say hypnosis is worthless because it is just suggestions... the bible uses EVERY single trick in the book, and the bible`s teaching lead to the "holy" crusades (of kill murder and rape across the world, too many died to count), the bigotry, greater intolerance to different people, and just now (Bush before him) Obama is assuring his people that this war is "GODS WILL!" And seriously, if darkness is considered evil... then no wonder Captain America and his men did not hesitate to kill and enslave Captain Africa and his people a couple years ago... And its still going on, thanks lord (sarcasm, duh) Suggestion: Most powerful force in the universe, and it is invisible to boot... daaaang im powerful.

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The power to use the internet whenever you want, but only on dialup

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The power to have infinite energy, but only when you're asleep.

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Customer: Waiter, there's a fly in my soup! Waiter: I'm terribly sorry sir, please let us replace your soup with a more satisfactory one which is hygienic, and does not contain a dead organism. Customer: Thanks.

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The power to orgasm everytime you pee.

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The power to see things with your eyes open

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pedo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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To connect to the Playstation network with your mind! Who would want to?

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the power to read impossibly fast, but only when you're watching a movie with no subtitles

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The power to stop people from committing suicide just before they do, but only by killing them...

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The power to grow one inch, but you need to shrink one inch to do so.

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The power to read minds only when people are thinking of broken pencils in a bowl full of acid.

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The ability to have a xredit card with no limit but not know the pin

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the power to eat gold and turn it into koosh balls

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!