The helpers... early days part 3!: Shitfixer: What color is your poo? Hmm.. you should eat more vegetables.., You need someone to fix your toilet? Try calling Batman... Batman: Yes? Are you retarded? Dense or something? Of course I repair toilets and install showers! I am the goddamn Batman! The Pope: The less people use condoms, the more children we can bang! I really hope nobody finds out our secret reason for banning condoms or stuff... AMEN! Moral Man: People are gonna try crush me for the last one, they gotta find me first though... and I kill and eat Zealots (and pussy) for breakfast... and its nearly breakfast so please come by.. only 100 at the time though, I have limits too you know... although some still think I am perfect... sigh...

The power to snore inhumanly loud

The power to fly 2 feet in the air.

The ability to heat up an object by 1 degree for every week you hold it.

The power to wear crocs.

The power to use you`re veins as a lasso.

The power to easily dodge any bullets from any weapons ever... as long as the bullets are made of cheese.

The ability to survive without an apendix.

The power to turn into Donald Trump hair

The power to die when you use the letter e.

The power to fart out of your mouth

to transform into a middle aged woman to fondle with your own tits(every mans dream)

eht rewop ot daer sdrowkcab.

The power to nail anyone you want (legally) but no one remembers, including you

The power to vote for Donald trump as president

the power to speak chinese to indians and indians only

The power to continuously and periodically turn oxygen into carbon dioxide using magic organs in your chest by sucking the the atmosphere through your mouth.

the ability to become black.

The power to determine after 1 year that something is broken when you yourself have done it deliberately broken

The power to commit genocide, but only on things you love.

The power to make you`re penis really long! Like 500 meters long, and not being able to make it short(er) again.

The power to always fart at the most inappropriate time

The Power To Melt into goop when you eat Delicious food

The power to learn anything very quickly but to forget all knowledge of what you've learnt 3 seconds later.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!