The ability to lose Russian rolette, once.

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Clairvoyance, but only when your mothers having intimacy with your dad.

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The power to explode by yelling ALLAH FORGIVE MEEEEEEEEEE! (Bonus: you always appear on Al Jazeera when you blow yourself up)

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The power to generate lottery numbers which don't win

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The ability to talk to snakes but only if you have a lightning bolt scar on your forehead.

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The power to run as fast as a cheetah! Moral: A dead cheetah...

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the ability to make a banana talk uncontrollably to itself but only when people around it are high. the ability to make a banana momentarily stop talking. the ability to allow a banana to sing uncontrollably songs strictly about being a banana, previously sung by a mammal. the ability to write funny things but only about banana(s).

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The power to find hiding spots quicker... like anne frank and osama bin ladin

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Gas station quality laser pointer vision.

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The power to transform into a 37 year old World of Warcraft playing virgin

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the power to travel through in time, but only you when you are sleeping.

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The ability to switch your fingers with thumbs, and your thumbs with baby corn.

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The power to have a normal sized torso, but short legs.

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The power to jump 1 centimeter higher than you usually can

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The ability to crap out acid once every month.

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The power to seduce any woman... that weighs over 300 pounds.

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The power to make the tip of your penis invisible at will.

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The ability to visually contract STD's

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The power to see through the clothes of only the morbidly obese.

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The power to transform into Forever Alone guy and not be able to transform back.

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The power to shit brix

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The power to turn any dollar bill (1's, 5's, 10's etc.) and turn it into the amount of pennies equivalent to the bill.

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The power to catch em all

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The power of exact change

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!