MARIAN PRICE ISN'T DEAD BUT SOME SAY SHE'S DEAD INSIDE

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The power to hear train whistles from 50 miles away.

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the power to negate superpowers in a universe with no superpowers and no way to enter any universe with super powers

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The power to kill a manin just 30 years a spoon

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the power to disappear up your own asshole

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the power to grow mustache combs from your fingernails, but lack the ability to grow facial hair

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The ability to know everything and get anything you want, but you must poop out a poop the size of a horse.

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The power to smell like poop once every hour.

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The power to think of hilarious intensely racist jokes, but only at Black Lives Matter protests.

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The ability to dislike on any form of social media, but only if you are looking cross-eyed at your pinky finger while listening to a mashup of Justin Beiber and One Direction.

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The power to become yourself

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the power to switch your nose with your penis once a week, randomly and automatically.

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The power to summon a bucket of lukewarm water every 12 days.

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The power to be Sexually Molested And Raped Twice and be smart at the same time.

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The power to wipe your ass once, and only once.

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The power to fly, but you have to wee every 5 seconds.

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The power to shit brix

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the power to have a pointless superpower

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The ability to turn everything to gold; as long as the original material is gold.

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The power to do EVERYTHING backwards

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the power to not have power

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The power to have the longest little finger

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The power to kill yourself with your mind.

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The power to type anything you want the same time you think of what you want to type.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!