The power to understand math.

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The power to suck your own dick

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The power to absorb your hair into your body and the burp up a bottle of shampoo and you have to do this once a day or your eyes and ears and mouth and nose will liquify for a day.

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the ability to make real zero dollar bills

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The ability to teleport out of danger randomly, whenever you do you are handcuff at the hands and ancles naked. You also don't get to choose where you end up.

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The power to touch MC Hammer.

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The power to breath underwater, but only after someone has recently peed in it

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The power of not knowing the future

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The ability to say Chuck Norris is just a piece of shiuiiiiiiifweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeem999999999999kkkkkkkkøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøfhiihdddde AND DIE! Chuck Norris.

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Gas station quality laser pointer vision.

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the power to only eat sugar, but not things that tastes sweet.

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The Power to bite your own ear.

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The power to swallow instead of spid

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The power to lick your own elbow

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The power to erase your own existence.

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The power to teleport 10 years into the past just by sneezing. You also become hyper allergic to everything. And of course, you have no way to travel forward...

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the ability to fail lie detector tests.... consistently.

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The power to have an endless amount of bladder space, but you are born lacking the ability to urinate.

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The power to communicate with people that are within 20 metres of you

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The power to see through the clothes of only the morbidly obese.

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The power to transform into Forever Alone guy and not be able to transform back.

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The power to fly, but only while your feet are touching the ground.

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the power to see the future...but only the future of a crappy 5 houses town in the middle of nowhere..

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The power to be buried at sea

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!