the power to die at will

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the ability to be governor and have an Argentinian mistress

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The power to teleport up to 35 feet once a year

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The power to hit someone at the cost of your own life

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When walking down the street, i try to get to a crack in the pavement a few feet ahead of me, and step on it before the next car passes me on the road

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The power to make a rock so heavy that you can't lift it

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The power to complete a 100m race in exactly 100 seconds.

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The power of turning on the lights without touching the switch but only when its daytime

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The Power To Poop on Command.

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The power to kick ass and chew bubblegum but be all out of kicks. "sits down chews bubblegum"

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the power to evenly cook a hot pocket.

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The power to turn coleslaw into cabbage.

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The ability to read minds by absorbing their mental disorders

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Ability to become friends with anyone, but only on facebook

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The power of asdfgh

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The power to die when u drink bleach

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The power to turn into a cat while a dog is watching you.

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The power to become invisible, but it only works when you are using it for noble and moral purposes.

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The power to hear train whistles from 50 miles away.

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The power to flip the world upside-down when you do a handstand.

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The power to every two months to shoot three cotton balls at no great velocity from your left hand.

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The ability to say Chuck Norris is just a piece of shiuiiiiiiifweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeem999999999999kkkkkkkkøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøfhiihdddde AND DIE! Chuck Norris.

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the power to have access to unlimited porn but your parents never leave the room

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The Power to make Anyone's Teeth Clean...

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!