the power to evenly cook a hot pocket.

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The power to be AMAZING in bed, but only when you're having sex with a midget over the age of 40.

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ability to run very fast without stopping forever

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Turning into a brick wall. Forever.

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The power to come back to life just by yelling: I LIVE AGAIN! Or RESURRECTION! (which is not easy when you are dead)

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The ability to read minds by absorbing their mental disorders

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The power to wink with both eyes

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The power to become invisible, but it only works when you are using it for noble and moral purposes.

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The power to turn into a cat while a dog is watching you.

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The power to fly, but only when you are less than a foot off the ground.

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The power to fly really fast, but only in one direction (down).

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the power to grow mustache combs from your fingernails, but lack the ability to grow facial hair

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the power to start a new wave band with a neon Open sign, a single bath salt, and a wet Tibetan ritz cracker.

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The ability to say Chuck Norris is just a piece of shiuiiiiiiifweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeem999999999999kkkkkkkkøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøøfhiihdddde AND DIE! Chuck Norris.

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The ability to turn traffic lights red in your lane and green for everyone else

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The power to live through torture.

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The power to make every stop sign I see say "Stop HAMMERTIME"

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the ability to type slower.

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The power to transform into Forever Alone guy and not be able to transform back.

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The power to steal other people's pointless superpowers.

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Swiss army teeth.

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The power to sleep

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The power to seduce any woman by saying dorito, but you dont have any genitals.

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The power to set money on fire

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!