Useless super power? A shitbag (my former boss, now my employee, funny story really) at work heard I have diabetuus and started lecturing me in the meeting room in front off everybody as how sugar was bad, and that I should not drink artificial sugar and sodas and... ...Anyway he refused to shut up and had (back then) the guts to point at me and shout "SHUT UP I AM LECTURING YOU!" And continued "avoid juice and whatnot... ...Then I had enough bullshit for one day, slammed him against the wall and shouted: ITS DIABETES TYPE ONE QUEERFAG! I WAS BORN WITH IT ITS CALLED BREATHMINTS MOTHERFUKKER! Point: He called the cops and made up a lot of lies about me such as: "rhe one where I made him FEEL afraid for his life etc" which my former coleagues comfirmed where not true at all. then he called his boss in order to get me fired, his boss contacted me, we spoke, my former boss/"lecturer" got demoted, now two years later I got promoted to his former position... ...Before I left work yesterday, I grabbed my insuline pen and stuck it in my tigh and asked him/it:remember about that time you lectured me about diabetes?"... Funny story really, you should all have been there.

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The amazing ability to shart at your own will.

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the power to breathe under water but only when yourout of water

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Power to stop a moving oslating fan from moving.

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The superpower to makr Thanksgiving turkey taste like rotten eggs!

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The power to transform into a vegetable, but only one way

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the power to glow in the dark during the day.

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The ability to see the inside of your eyelids.

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The power to inhale beverages through your genitals.

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The power to create a rainbow when you fart.

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the power to pee and sneeze at the same time.

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The power of gentle breeze

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The power to understand a joke 30 seconds later after the last person in the group did it.

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The ability to suddenly realize you have Cancer.

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The power to make a pint a gallon

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The power to demand people to thumb you down! (That would make this pointless power even more pointless, which deserves a thumbs up... but...) Moral: THUMB ME DOWN! NAO!

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the ability to like homeade fudge.(not fudge)

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the power to have sex with any women you want. with your whole family watching

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The power to die

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The power to go back in time to when you were in Kindergarten for the soul purpose of eating the crayons before anyone else.

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Being able to create duplicates of yourself, however you must give birth to these duplicates out of your anus (incredibly painful and its highly likely that you will pass out from the pain). And to disappear they must claw their way back up.

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The Ability To See When Your Eyes Are Closed

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The ability to glow in the dark but only when your really sleepy.

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The ability to predict something after it's already happened.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!