The power to make everyone you touch see nothing but porn

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To have your speed, strength, reflexes and senses heightened to the level of whatever is appropriate in your situation.

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The power to poop fast enough to splash your own bum.

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The power to close your eyes and drift off to a state of unconsciousness.

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The ability to draw an imperfect circle

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The power to like this text that explain a pointless superpower.

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The power to become me. Moral: You could not handle the awesomeness and would ruin yourself just so you can feel "normal" rather than awesome.

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The ability to defy death... only when you commit suicide.

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The power to empty your bladder without going to the restroom but only when you really have to poop and it is trying to force its way out.

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the power to teleport 2 in. from were you were standing in 8 hours

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the power to make people's spleen hurt for no reason

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The power to absorb energy wavelengths, in the visible light spectrum, from objects and create a mental picture of the shape and color of the objects they reflected off of.

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The power to fly, but only when you are less than a foot off the ground.

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the immunity of death unless youre about to die

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The power to read any language but you cant understand anything it means

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(PS: Neo was the seventh Jesus, we live in the matrix)

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The power of flight, but also have vertigo. VertigoMan to the resc Aggh!!!! Please someone get me down. OH GOD!!!! HELP!!!!

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The ability to teleport to distant locations with no way of returning.

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the ability to make a banana talk uncontrollably to itself but only when people around it are high.& the ability to make a banana momentarily stop talking.

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The power to pause and resume time, but you also pause yourself.

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The power to live through torture.

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The Power to believe you have superpowers

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The power to create nothing out of nothing

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The power to get hungry when looking at exotic animals.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!