The power to state the obvious.

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The power to not get caught typing this in lesson.

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The power to switch your left pinky toe with your right big toe and vice versa.

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The power life like a hermit.

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The power to understand that Jesus called himself Son of man, which translates into Anderson, which makes a certain movie make a bit more sense. Moral: THIS IS MY WORLD MISTER ANDERSON! MY WOOOOOORLD!

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The power to triple-click in the time it takes a regular human to double-click.

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The power to activate all musical instruments at full volume just by going to sleep.

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The power to wear your shirt backwards all day.

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the power to imagine everybody with underpants while your nervous but it only happens in your dreams

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The power to get thumbs down.

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The power to make only slightly funny jokes

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the power to give anyone an incurable disease

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The ability to breathe underwater but only when above water

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The power to fail hard at the catchphra (or whatever its called) simply because you keep answering garbage when it asks "what is the jummiest!" Moral: I work out hard dammit! I want muscles of steel! And Bananasplit contains banana (duh) which just binds fat and makes me look like a bodybuilder... (yes I did look like that and would eat garbage rather than banana, I mean most "family restaurant" foo out there is garbage) "Family restaurant" guide, because moral man loves you: Mc Donalds, Kentucky Fried Chicken, Burger King, and I really need fats and proteins to work out as hard as I do... I mean I am running on a uh.. stand still training bicycle thingie... too tired to look it up.

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the power to make elton john gay

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the power to disappear up your own asshole

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The power to be a bird that can't fly

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The power to naturally wake up at a certain time but only if you set an alarm.

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the power of the Anti-petter gun, which fires bullshit over the moon.

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The power to talk to your socks but only when they're dying...

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The power to get massive boners when you are reading a presentation.

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The power to die on command

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the ability to see into the past

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The power to change the color of your piss

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!