The power to eat carrot cake, then die 12 seconds

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The power to ?-1.

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The power to make up a pointless superpower because you are to lazy to make up a good one

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The power to resurrect 3 percent of the time you kill yourself on purpose.

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The power to know what you do when you discuss the secret formula on the third Wednesday in January and it's not raining outside after we've gargled with vanilla pudding.

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The power to know WTF is going on

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the power to shrink down to the size of a quark but then you turn into a black hole and destroys the universe.

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?u?op ?p?sdn ?d?? o? ?????q? ???

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The power to let 100 cockroaches crawl upon you for everytime you display emotion

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The ability to summon Cthulhu automatically when you reach the age of 23.5.

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The power of x-ray vision including mild radiation and only seeing bones

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The power to piss your pants each time you feel threatened.

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the power to give any goatAIDS using your penis

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The power to heal yourself when your not hurt

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The power to die just by trying to use the word l...

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the power to permanently change your name to Graham

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Hetsy overpay otay peaksay igpay atinlay

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the power to shoot superman

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The power to shit in your eye

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the power to know when it isn't either 4 or 9 o'clock.

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The power to make a watch that functions as a small phone and is named after a fruit. I would call it Applewatch.

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The Power to bite your own ear.

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The power to time travel 1 second at a time

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The power to instantly determine when someone is a dumbass.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!