The power to grow back your nails 2 seconds after you pick them.

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The ability to never see CGI in any movie ever again

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The power to turn pizza into math worksheets. -Big C

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The power to have a super power,

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Just because you do not see and advert here, it does not mean it is not here... Moral: Dudu duduh dudududun... ALWAYS MORAL-COLA! (aka Moke in the brits) NOW IN LIGHT AND SUPERFAT EDITIONS! Order now for the special I am fagneto edition! TASTE THE FAGNETIC! Because if gay is your way, todays morals, support this way! Lesbian-Coke is out of stock, but pre-order now and receive a moral man offer: "the lesbian drunk party invite international live!" *porn music* Hurry up! Only 2 Billion tickets left! No wait... just 50 left!... no wait... 40... no 30... 29... you better hurry ladies! As much *free* booze you can drink! *The booze Is free, the entrance is free, but the payment to get out of the building depends on how much you drink, non payers will be graped and their sex pictures will be sold on the internet* *All lesbian sex pictures will be sold on the internet, grape is not allowed! Surprise sexy time is allowed though!* Moral-Cola!

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The power to vote for Osama Bin Laden for president. Moral: And to believe it could still be worse...

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The power to move at the speed of ripeness. Moral: Ripeness is actually slightly slower than time, true fact.

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The power to change from a normal human to a normal human than die.

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I am the daddy devil of all evil hhaha like A boss

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The ability to change languages after every word, but you can't not do so.

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The ability to make the skin above your eyebrows really, really dry and flaky---whenever you want!

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The power to think of pointess facts at any given moment

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the power to make glass clear

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The power to SPEAK IN ALL CAPS.

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The power to see the present.

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the power to fart terrible gas

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The power to be able to shoot arrows really well...cough.

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The power to think of a useless superpower, but start typing and forg........ GOD DAMMIT!

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The power to jerk off with no hands.

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the power to permanently change your name to Graham

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the power to have no powers.

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The ability to teleport, but only into solid stone.

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the ability to say "you're killing me", without irony...to my murderer

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the power to follow "photocation" on instagram.. its worthless but who gives a *#$%^ !!!

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!