The power to seduce any woman... that weighs over 300 pounds.

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The power to summon earthworms

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The power to make the tip of your penis invisible at will.

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The ability to clean

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The power to see through the clothes of only the morbidly obese.

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The power to change the color of your piss

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The power to instantly kill yourself

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the power to always hug people

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to be able to lift any weight of feathers

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the power to travel through time... at the speed of normal time.

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The power to be able to tie your shoe halfway, by using your mind.

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The power to taste the 2% that's real juice

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The power to be able to understand any language, after studying that language until you feel comfortable that you know it.

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the power to make your best friend's crush fall in love with you, but not your own crush.

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The power to turn your head 360 degrees

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The power to drink an entire bottle of soy suase without dieing

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The power to shapeshift, but only when below ground.

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The power to turn pizza into math worksheets. -Big C

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The power to help bitches stay alive! Bitches love staying alive!

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I can talk to fish.... They don't have a lot to say

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The power to see in the dark outside but only at day time.

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wast your time on the computer

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The power to be immortal, but only whilst dead.

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The power to only be drunk while driving.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!