Spontaneous combustion... when on the internet

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The power to think out loud without saying a word

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The power to instantly ressurect at the very same spot if you get submerged under lava or acid.

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The power to change any text in sight from US to British spelling.

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the power to jay walk, and never get caught. (your superhero name then must be Jay Walker)

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the power to stop time for everything... including yourself

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Just because you do not see and advert here, it does not mean it is not here... Moral: Dudu duduh dudududun... ALWAYS MORAL-COLA! (aka Moke in the brits) NOW IN LIGHT AND SUPERFAT EDITIONS! Order now for the special I am fagneto edition! TASTE THE FAGNETIC! Because if gay is your way, todays morals, support this way! Lesbian-Coke is out of stock, but pre-order now and receive a moral man offer: "the lesbian drunk party invite international live!" *porn music* Hurry up! Only 2 Billion tickets left! No wait... just 50 left!... no wait... 40... no 30... 29... you better hurry ladies! As much *free* booze you can drink! *The booze Is free, the entrance is free, but the payment to get out of the building depends on how much you drink, non payers will be graped and their sex pictures will be sold on the internet* *All lesbian sex pictures will be sold on the internet, grape is not allowed! Surprise sexy time is allowed though!* Moral-Cola!

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The power to never be burned, but only when underwater.

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The ability to lose Russian rolette, once.

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Being immortal but not being able to eat food and you always feel horrible, but your body heals you every day so you get more pain every day.

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the power to be on time daily, but only after ur late

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the power to be invisible, but only at night

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the power to eat waffles

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Power to know EVERYTHING you say tha just happened

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The Power of being Friendzoned

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The power of not knowing the future

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The power to sing beautifully but only when around def people.

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The power to be invincible when you cannot get hurt

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The ability to switch out elevator music with NPR

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The power to be on facebook and do homework at the same time

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The power to like this comment while you can't like any other ones.

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The power to orgasm every five.. UGGHOOOAAHAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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The power to shorten your lifespan by 10 seconds.

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The power of super strength but only in your left pinky toe - EO

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!