The power to destroy the whole universe by any sudden movement. (Our existence rests on you`re shoulders man, don't even breathe nor blink)

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the power to read the thoughts of inanimate objects.

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To be small u could be step on because no one can hear u

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The power to think of a funny power

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The power to eat just 1 Lays potato chip

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the power to die

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The power to look at huge breasts and avoid thinking about it.

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The power to not hear thunder.

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TyPiNg In LoWeR aNd CaPs To AnNoY oThErS

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The helpers... early days part 3!: Shitfixer: What color is your poo? Hmm.. you should eat more vegetables.., You need someone to fix your toilet? Try calling Batman... Batman: Yes? Are you retarded? Dense or something? Of course I repair toilets and install showers! I am the goddamn Batman! The Pope: The less people use condoms, the more children we can bang! I really hope nobody finds out our secret reason for banning condoms or stuff... AMEN! Moral Man: People are gonna try crush me for the last one, they gotta find me first though... and I kill and eat Zealots (and pussy) for breakfast... and its nearly breakfast so please come by.. only 100 at the time though, I have limits too you know... although some still think I am perfect... sigh...

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The power to give super powers to others, but only to people you don't like.

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The power to shoot projectiles from your eyes to the inside of your head.

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The power to be away from the Internet without getting bored.

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The ability to read anything, and never understand it.

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THE POWER OF AUTISM !!!

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The power to throw away and break your wine/blood glass away before yelling HAVE AT THY! At the comment below (below this one duh, you see the other brown box? Yeah that one genius) Moral: Yeah yeah, you dont get it, but its awesome because its a MISERABLE PILE OF SECRETS!

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The power to travel forward in time at the speed of normal time.

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The power to have consensual sex with any dog of your choice.

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The ability to make iguanas in Peru blink uncontrolably

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The power to transform into anything you have already become

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The ability to know how someone felt exactly 1 year prior but you don't know why.

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Walk on water, swim in land!

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The ability to put your whole foot in your mouth.

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The power to summon garden mushrooms in the top of your head every time you're having a serious talk to anyone

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!