The power to snore.

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The power to perform stan up comedy whilst sitting down

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The power to type: Hey if you wanna read funny "superpewers", then you have come to the right place! Just follow the trail of The moral man so he can stay in the middle the place where nobody looks or gives a sh... you know what? Dont thumb me, Moral man wants to stay down here rather than stuck in the middle of nowhere. Moral: If telling people to read more pointless superpowers at the "newest" superpowers, isnt pointless, then that would mean that this whole "pointless superpowers section is really meaningful... which by itself is meaningless... WIN!

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The power to repel women.

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The power to travel to a parallel universe where everyone who exists dies every .1 milliseconds.

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The power to have your piss turn to solid gold before it exits you.

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The power to shoot socks out of your hands.

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The power to be Chuck Norris. Oh wait..

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The power to be AMAZING in bed, but only when you're having sex with a midget over the age of 40.

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The power to time travel only a Planck second into the future.

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The power to be instantly transported to Switzerland, naked, whenever you reach orgasm.

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The power to enlarge your penis but only when you use a penis pump.

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The power to vote on useless superpowers

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The power to become annoyed by annoying people

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The power to automatically uncensor anything you want.

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The power to throw your crotch as a powerful one time grenade.

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The power to turn into a cat while a dog is watching you.

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The power to break your bones on command.

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The power to turn expensive drinks into shit flavored milk

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The power to turn any plasma tv into ice with 3 times the mass

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The power to enjoy eating potatoes slightly more

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The power to turn any edible object brown.

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The power to laugh while laughing.

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The power to make people feel self confident when you encourage them

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!