- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

the power to hold your breath 0.01 seconds longer than the average human

The power to play a snippet of Darude-Sandstorm whenever you inhale or exhale.

The power to think of epic jokes but only at funerals

The power to eat three times a day.

the power to turn retarted

The power to fly only one inch off the ground

The power to make Q-Tips rain from the sky every month

The power to... We're sorry, but something went wrong. We've been notified about this issue and we'll take a look at it shortly.

the ability to levitate

The power to move at the speed of ripeness. Moral: Ripeness is actually slightly slower than time, true fact.

the ability to make your eyes pop out.

the power to become translucent

The power to obey gravity

The power to think oppositely

The power to make your nipples hurt when you twist them

The power of having a bulletproof appendix.

the power to travel 1-day into the future by waiting 24 hours

The power to be so fast, that if you sprint forward you travel the whole world just in time to fuck yourself.

The power to think of your death and then you die.

The power to be afraid of horses.

The power to kill yourself just by thinking about something.

the power to misspell

The power to finish right before you start (If you know what I mean)

the power to shoot fireballs.....only when your under water

Pointless Super Powers