SHAPESHIFT - only into a guinee pig

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The power to reed a platypus mind.

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the power to run 10000 mph, but evertime you ran you were teleported to a police station and you turned into a black guy

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the power to morph into yourself

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The power to murder rocks.

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the ability to dice a watermelon by looking at it but when you eat any of the diced watermelon a magic watermelon grows in your stomach and you look fat

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The power to change traffic signals to anything that is not beneficial to you.

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the power to eat anything edible but not if it's edible.

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The power to shoot liqiud gold ever 3-6 years only when you come across jesus.

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The power to wake up every morning and have to pee

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the power to fire angry ticks out of your nipples

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the power to do nothing

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The power to always get caught by the scooby doo gang

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The power to type a power on this website and see it's already taken.

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The power to make anyone you see look surprise.

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The power to defy gravity, but only for the fraction of a second.

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The power to exaggerate everything, a power a billion, trillion overly trabillion times more powerful than anything, like 3000000 Chuck Norrises, except they are all weak in comparison to this power.

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That F-ucking ass hole that keeps typing morals all the time, he is F`n annoying! Moral: You thought I was a hater eh? Hahaha got you there ;) And if that is not the most pointless pointlessity in the world, then... I give shit about thumbs ups really, they just discovered that I have an bad allergy to dust, and thus I have been unable to work out for TWO YEARS! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT! Me so happy, me love you long time. That is what women usually say to me, instead that they change the happy with horny... and replace you with someone else`s name. Self Irony... such a delight... and maybe I am lying... who knows... who wants to know? Nobody? :( sob... excellent! :D Damn CATCHPHRA! I SWEAR I USED TO HAVE A KITTEN THAT WAS TWICE THE SIZE OF TEXAS!

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The ability to talk to anybody in the world, as long as they are within your eyesight.

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The power to smell through your arse.

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the power to crap out bite-sized super heroes.

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the power to give yourself cancer that you can't get rid of

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The most pointless super power should be - To be able to change your hair dye whenever you want

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The power of laser pointer vision.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!