- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The SuperPower To Have No SuperPowers

the power to eat with your butt

Acid tears.

The power to not be turned off by the word "moist"

The ability to print random memes on their tongue, but it has to be one that everyone in the room has seen before.

The power grow arm pit hair 5 times faster and 5 times longer than it was after shaving.

The power to read this.

The power to wear the same clothes every day without them getting dirty.

The power to have your mother suck your dick dry as long as there is any sperm in your balls.

The power to be immortal until the moment that you would die.

The power to jizz mango chutney

The power of turning to stone everyone who says to you "will u fancy a slightly racist T-shirt?"

to zap people but only yourself

The ability to get up early for school, but only on weekends.

The power to read terms and conditions

The power to suck your own dick

The power to instantly make an accurate assessment on tomorrow's hangover probability well before you've consumed far more than the amount of alcohol which would guarantee it...and yet manage to forget sometimes you have this superpower.

The power to transform into a paralysed turtle with half its shell missing

the power to see the present

To be able to levitate one object in front of you for one second a day

The power to have a great singing voice, but only in the shower,

The ability to teleport 0.00000000000000007 seconds in the past

The power to lose 7-1 to Germany

Feeling people's depression.

Pointless Super Powers