- Pointless Super Powers

The ability to walk five hundred miles but than you have to walk five hundred more.

the power to laugh at burials and cry at weddings

To be immortal, but injuries do not heal and the pain is 100 times more intense

You might not GET super power, but you can get some super bonus. Get free rides with Lyft, (only new passengers). Use Lyft official code "IAMLUCKY" to get $50 up to $200 in ride credits. Now thats like a little superpower, you get to teleport from one place to other for free with Lyft. Get some super bonus until you really ever get a super power ;-)

The ability to headbutt yourself in the face.

The power of omniscience but it causes a near fatal heart attack every time you think.

The power of finding an object that you thought it disappered in a black hole in your bedroom.

The power to shoot rainbows out of your dick, the rainbows can pwn anyone if you smoked crack before using this power

th eability to have sex with anyone in the world but have to have sex with rosie o'donnell first

The power to read minds but only when you're alone

The power is to think MEMEZ are so nonsence, Even if you ever kissed an girl.

The power to make a rather pointless comeback here... Moral: See what I mean? ;),

The power to do control the atmosphere, but only in space.

the power to become phil collins, but only after peter gabrial left

The power to hurt your enemies but feel their pain

the power to shit out of your nose

The power to have some fucking muslim (white guy, no arab) tell my wife that since we have been married for three years and I Speak spanish/Russian/Japanse/Itali... Anyways that she should at least be able to speak fluently spanish so shame on her. (The fuck I be teaching her spanish in Norway?) The power? To tell my wife that if I ever see him, I will chop his head off... My wife said I think he meant it well, I said, so do I. The reason its useless? My wife refused so I had to enter their stupid meeting room and tell him myself... He asked me who I was while shivering, my answer: Want to learn how to speak motherdfucking spanish? He supposedly spent staring down the floor for hours while refusing his boss`s offer to call the cops on me and told my wife to tell me he was sorry. I goddamn bet he is fucking sorry! Nero: Now and forever.

the power to have another pointless superpower

Being able to transform into anything on and off the planet, only, you have to be touching that object.

The power of confusing the word "your" for "you're", or vice versa.

The power to shatter a mirror just by staring at it.

Most of God`s powers. One: He has existed eternally, and one day he said: LET THERE BE LIGHT! Uh... so he has lived eternal eternities in the dark? Explains his shitty mood... Two: Speaking about let there be light... the very first sentence he utters is wrong, because "First God created light".... And then he went "oops" and time traveled back in time to create voice first so he could say anything? Three: He sent his son to combat sin... how powerful is sin? So powerful that a so called omnipotent being had to sacrifice his son? And what sacrifice is it to have your immortal son killed just to prove that he is immortal? Sounds like a guy being sawed in half and then coming out whole... TADAH! (applause from the audience). So in the end he sacrificed... nothing? He died to prove he could not die? Moral: Jesus: Epic troll..

the power to travel through in time, but only you when you are sleeping.

tumor boy, has the power to grow a tumor in his own body.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!