The power to to excrete fluids from your body after digesting food or obtaining liquids

The ability to heal someone by trying to beat them to a pulp.

The power to eat food, but as you eat the food you turn into a giant green monster and have to terrorize Japan for the rest of your life. As a result of you terrorizing Japan, McDonald's comes out with monster toys and Universal does a chi...ldren's movie about how monsters can be cute cuddly creatures in order to calm down those who are having nightmares at night because of your horrific actions in Japan. While in Japan though a mad scientist creates a unmosterification ray gun that heals you. Then you decide you have to go on an all liquid diet so over the course of many years you become impervious to drowning, in that time you also develop the ability to speak with sea animals with a sonar type ability. Thus rendering you as Aquaman the most useless superhero ever.

The power of immortality, but only when you try to commit suicide.

The power to never be tired, but only when rowing a boat.

The power to summon cops to arrest you

The power to waste time and sit around doing nothing and not helping society when you could be doing something productive

The power to die just by trying to use the word l...

The power to eat your poop

The power to turn gourmet meals into shit.

The abiltity to grow an additional 4 fingered hand from your inner thigh

the power to make your nipples taste like shit and your shit taste like nipples

The power of being pointless

The power to uncontrollably laugh and point at every black guy you see

The ability to perceive the presence of light.... with your ears. (warning, blindness may effect abilities potency.)

The power to not do it.

The power to remove all flavour from food.

the power to freeze people only when it's cold

The power to turn into random objects

The power to quote Castlevania quotes all day... yelling them out on the streets! Moral: WHAT IS A MAN! People look at me and laugh... and moral man struts past... he has never been so awesome before... They see me rollin... they laughing... they lovin... and I hope nobody calls the ambulance because I am crazy... in love... I can see it in your eyes... I can see it in your smiiileeee...

the ability to produce petrol from your ankles but only when you're on fire.

The power to look into the car next to me at the exact moment the driver is picking his nose

the power to turn into a cheerio at will

The power of speaking every laguage on earth, but to know only one word in your entire life.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!