The power to be blind when you sleep

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The power to read everything 2 seconds faster than usual

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The power to know the name of every show while the title card is in front of you but only if you are holding cheap mango chutney

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The power to control sloths

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The power to perfectly tie a Cherry stem in your mouth only while your in and elevator going down in Shanghai on the fourth shortest tower with a pink roof

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A follow up to the next comment bellow... (the irony) is that you also get the powers to type YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! And other quotes at random points... I got these powers... you do not believe me? YOU THINK YOU HAVE THAT LUXURY? YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! Moral: GUANTANAMO BAY CUBA! Just making conversation... (throws random small dog in the trash container) last part was just me its not like you get the power to do what he does in movies :P

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The power to type some incredibly perverted "superpowers" and get a boner while laughing so loud the neighbors on both sides of your apartment closed their windows.

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Power to see through walls, but it only works with glass.

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The power to see even though you can already see.

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The ability to just 1 meter high, but whenever you do so you lose a meter from your height, only to regain it when you hit the ground.

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The superpower of having no superpower.

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The power to finish work instantly but only after the deadline

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the power to have a dick in the box

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The power to be never need to use the bathroom

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to make asians smart

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The ability to know everything and get anything you want, but you must poop out a poop the size of a horse.

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The power to travel in time but only to the moment of your death.

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The power to waste time thinking of and uploading pointless superpowers

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The ability to always wake up in time but never fall asleep in time.

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The ability to fly, but only while you're touching the ground.

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The power to see your neck without a mirror

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The power to look at this thing - Browny the dow

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the power to go into a coma

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The power to grow fingernails.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!