To grow your fingernails out and in very quickly.

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The ability to know what time it is, but only when you have a watch on.

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The power to die at will, and you can only do it once.

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The power to turn into Patrick Star permenently and be dumb as him.

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the power to shit with your mouth

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The power to transport yourself back in time to when the universe began!

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To be flaming gay. Both kinds.

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The ability to put your whole foot in your mouth.

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the power to read captchas

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The ability to find a squirrels nuts

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the power to fail at everything you

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The power to become the worlds most famous necrophilia pornstar after dying.

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The power of Bulletproof fingernails

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The power to smell poop

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The power to see through things like locked cabinets, wrapped birthday presents etc. But only if you know whats inside.

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The power to be blind when you sleep

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to be on fire always.(even when u are in water)

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the power to get free airplane flights but only to the place you are in

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The power to be AMAZING in bed, but only when you're having sex with a midget over the age of 40.

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You can fly, but only while on a plane that's in the air.

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The power to see even though you can already see.

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The power to teleport to the center to the center of the Earth.

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The ability to have all of the money in the world, but then have to share it with everybody in the world.

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The power to have sex whenever you want, but only with Rosie O'Donnell

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!