the power to control your own body movements

The ability to only fart in public

The power to transform into yourself

The ability to turn into a hipster at will.

The power to stop people from committing suicide just before they do, but only by killing them...

The ability to read any language and understand it perfectly but only in pitch black darkness.

The power to use your penis and testicles as a powerful one time grenade in case you get assaulted. (probably the most pointless power ever)

To pee standing up.

the power to die if you think

The power life like a hermit.

The power to not hear thunder.

the power to in power your self

My charms is my superpower, but damn I cant shut up after spending some quality time with the ladies! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOT! MY BODY WAS NOT READY! I feel like yelling out my real name, but you know, if you know me (I am easily recognizable) the girls I spend time with would feel like I am bragging about them, and I am not, I am simply celebrating my conquest, you see, you came, you saw... BUT I CONQUERED! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT Moral: Feel free to thumb this down, my superpowers need to be contained, or else I will beep my way to an early grave! Girls, mwah... and you know, just dodge the kiss if you cant handle love personified, they arent homing nor anything... Should I ask my doctor if she has any medications that will help me wire down after uh... Multiple female company? HAHAHAHAAAAAAH!... The thought made me kinda sad, im better, now just to prove to my company here that I got balls of steel, I am gonna post this and let you judge me all you want! BECAUSE YOU CANT HAVE EM!

the power to breath without thinking about it.

The power to blink your eyelids in Morse Code

The power to believe people will vote for you`re comment, which starts WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY in the back.

The power to wash your mouth out with soap.

The power to find hiding spots quicker... like anne frank and osama bin ladin

The power to understand a joke 30 seconds later after the last person in the group did it.

the ability to shit active helicopters >o

the power of make your leg invisible

The power to read View Terms of Services

The power to not yawn after someone else does.

The power to fly, but only when on the ground

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!