The power to communicate with people that are within 20 metres of you

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The power to levitate 1 inch off the ground for 5 seconds at a time.

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The power to talk to animals but only if they've been run over first.

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The ability to instantly make all your clothes vanish but only when you're in a job interview

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the ability to fly to Pluto holding ur breath

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The power to be able to make yourself catch on fire, but not be fire proof...

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The ability to sling web like Spiderman except you can only shoot webs from your butt hole.

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The power to change the temperature by 1 degree, once every leap year.

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The power to not burn but only when its under 32 degrees fahrenheit

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The power to get pulled over for going 1mph over the speed limit.

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The power to kill someone at 20 meters with your mind, but it doesn't work within 21 meters.

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The power to speak Braille.

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The power to change lemonade into lemons.

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The ability to turn traffic lights red in your lane and green for everyone else

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The power to see everything 3D without 3D glasses

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The power to travel back in time to the 1800s but only as a black guy.

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The ability to turn your ribcage invisible at will

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Most of Gods powers part 2: Let us pretend that God really created everything... including sin right? God: Jebus, I want you to go down to earth and receive torture of legendary proportions, and die. Jebus: Why? God: To remove sin... Jebus: Uh... cant you just remove it? God replies either: 1. Yeah but ill be more fun this way, ill have you killed just to show you are not mortal anyways lol troll! 2. No, Sin is more powerful than me, so you better go die to not really die, relax... 3. Son, my ways are mysterious, "thunderstorm scares Jebus to go down) Moral disclaimer: God can be anyone`s God, and Jebus is not to be confused with the completely different Jesus. I mean every God out there and Jebus is simply a name I put instead of whoever prophet your religion has, so I really insulted everyone religious. Moral: (the other was a disclaimer) Religion is written by men... drunk men... now go eat your bread and drink your wine... and you shall become like Jebus... tortured and crucified? To show the world you are immortal? Side effects: Alcholism and all that follows, including a quicker death... to prove your immortality? (Hypnosis is powerful shit, especially when you are drunk, take it from a experienced hypnotist)

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The ability to write funny pointless superpowers down, but only on paper.

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THE POWER TO FUCK ANYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU SUCK

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The ability to enter the gender's changing room with no one noticing but losing the ability to see and feel.

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power to type using my head.. .because my fingers are there

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The power to not write pointless powers.

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The power to produce 5 times the normal amount of ball sweat.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!