the ability to make warm, flat, generic brand lemon/lime soda trickle from the end of your pinky finger

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The power to know all the answers in the test when the test is over

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The power to be invincible......... only when you are not in danger or harm.

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The power to shoot billions of neutrinos from your hands at an enemy.

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The power to only like foods that are at least two different colors, but only on Thursdays. All the other days are whatever you wanna eat :D

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The ability to have udders for nipples.

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The power to stretch infinitely, but you cant return to your normal state.

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The power to kill you self.

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The ability to summon a used cottonbud once in your life

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the power to give yourself cancer that you can't get rid of

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spontaneous ejaculation

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The epic power of laser pointer vision.

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Ability to shape-shift into your twin brother.

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The power to fly, but only while your feet are touching the ground.

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The power to fly upwards but not downwards

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The power to fly but you will only last in the air for 3 seconds

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the power to catch em' all

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time travel that ownly have 5 time before loose it

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The power to turn 12% invisible.

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The power to turn a dollar into three quarters.

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Most of God`s powers. One: He has existed eternally, and one day he said: LET THERE BE LIGHT! Uh... so he has lived eternal eternities in the dark? Explains his shitty mood... Two: Speaking about let there be light... the very first sentence he utters is wrong, because "First God created light".... And then he went "oops" and time traveled back in time to create voice first so he could say anything? Three: He sent his son to combat sin... how powerful is sin? So powerful that a so called omnipotent being had to sacrifice his son? And what sacrifice is it to have your immortal son killed just to prove that he is immortal? Sounds like a guy being sawed in half and then coming out whole... TADAH! (applause from the audience). So in the end he sacrificed... nothing? He died to prove he could not die? Moral: Jesus: Epic troll..

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the power to count from A to purple

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The power to only be obesely fat.

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The power to drink 10 gallons of water only when you desperately need to piss.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!