The power to return to life but only after being ritually buried 6ft underground

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the power to dodge cars only when they are parked

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The ability to scratch your balls telepathically.

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The power to troll the Internet.

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The power of levitate at will but only in a zero-gravity environment.

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The ability to make everything on you invisible, exept yourself

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The power to help bitches stay alive! Bitches love staying alive!

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The power to eat turkey with nothing more than your mouth.

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Laser vision but only if you are looking into a mirror

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The power to write about power.

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The power to eat air with your lungs

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The power to be anyone you want but your still a nobody

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The power to have car insurance, but only when you don't have a car.

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The power to read Sarah Palin's mind

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The power to be able to make your least favorite food or drink, but you cannot eat it and it only technically exists if you don't look at it.

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the power to suddenly have suicidal thoughts

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The power to make apples into pennies one per day.

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The power to gain 50 dollars every daybut have to pay 75 back every 12 hours.

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To be able to turn into any molusk when in a lava pit

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The power to, receive THE POWER! What is this power you may ask... it is the power of TRUE POWER!

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The power to shoot string cheese out of your fingers.

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the power to see stuff

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The power to blink 1% faster than normal.

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The power to see through stuff, but you can't turn it off.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!