The power to stop time for 1 second

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the power to transform into a rock.

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The power to make a sound that attracts whales

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The power to time travel to the present.

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the power to know what time is not

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The power to fly into the sun.

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the power to make music for deaf people

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The ability to not get sunburn, but only at night.

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The power to look out any window in the world and immediately get it on the face by a bald eagle.

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the power to shoot poop very far out your butt

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the power to eat 10 cotton balls every year

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The power to have superhuman strength. But I have to jack off to do so.

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The ability to inaccurately predict the future.

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The power to take huge shits at will.

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The power to give automatically give all your money to a Nigerian businessman for a special investment opportunity

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The ability to lose all your limbs on command.

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the power to find children extremely attractive

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The power to transform into a sentient cup-holder

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The powre to speel thengs wrong but put things in the right order

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The power to jizz mango chutney

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the ability to teleport to th place you were 5 seconds ago, unless you've just been to a bank vault and just knocked out teh security gaurd.

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The power to be white but only in the city limits of detroit or compton.

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The power to be millionaire, but only when you have a million dollars.

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The power to pee out blue

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!