The power to teleport the remote control to you from across the room twithout getting up, but only if your TV is broken.

The power to be lazy and a normal human being. The Average Joe Power.

The power to walk on water for 1 second and then fall in

Death at will

to shrink smaller than oxygen molecules

The power to resurrect, but only in an electric chair in Texas.

The power to fart out of someone else's bum

The power to burst into flames but not be immune to heat.

The power to become extremely strong and intelligent by being in contact with substances such as: -Kryptonite -Adamantium -Any acid that can melt trough glass -A gallon of moose sperm ( you must be submerged)

The power to know who farted at any time.

The power to jump into a puddle of pigs and scream: "Alllah is great" and the go home and have some nive frosted flakes.

The power of super sonic strength and speed only when you resite Shakespeare.

The power of perfect 20/20 hindsight

The helpers... early days part 3!: Shitfixer: What color is your poo? Hmm.. you should eat more vegetables.., You need someone to fix your toilet? Try calling Batman... Batman: Yes? Are you retarded? Dense or something? Of course I repair toilets and install showers! I am the goddamn Batman! The Pope: The less people use condoms, the more children we can bang! I really hope nobody finds out our secret reason for banning condoms or stuff... AMEN! Moral Man: People are gonna try crush me for the last one, they gotta find me first though... and I kill and eat Zealots (and pussy) for breakfast... and its nearly breakfast so please come by.. only 100 at the time though, I have limits too you know... although some still think I am perfect... sigh...

the power to live forever but you'll die if you don't eat 100 coach roaches a week

The power to turn anything you touch into old.

The power to be anyone you want but your still a nobody

The power to taste anything you look at, except for food. Nothing edible counts...

The power to die randomly,for no reason.

To be waterproof but only when your not wet

The power to see through water

The power to gain 50 dollars every daybut have to pay 75 back every 12 hours.

The ability to know what time it is, but only when you have a watch on.

The power to communicate with your own toenail clippings.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!