The power to fight Chuck Norris... and lose.

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The ability to cause spiders to unpredictably materialize on your body, but only when you're sleeping or otherwise unaware of your surroundings.

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The power to troll yourself

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The power to not get sun burnt when the sun's out

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the power to tell when someone is in your car

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The power to be white but only in the city limits of detroit or compton.

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the ability to see thru objects but only if they're made of cheese

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the ability to be a box of donuts in a police station

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The power to poop out you penis

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The power to make anything taste slightly more like spit.

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The power to make pot legal except when there's cops around.

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The ability to control the internet

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the ability to go the speed limit

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The power to be the ceo of BP

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The power to eat anything, as long as it's food

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To Shoot Piss Out Of Your Mouth Only If You Are Taking A Dump

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the power to shit bicks

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The power to clap with one hand.

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The power to survive jumping form a plane as long as you have a parachute.

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the power to shoot a powerful red laser beam everytime you open your eyes.

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The power to have orgasm everytime a cold breeze rolls in

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The power to see white objects in off white.

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the power to shrink or grow at will, except your organs stay the same size

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The power to telekinetically pull sharp objects towards you at incredible speeds.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!