the power to say everything in Comic Sans font.

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The power to die when you get scared.

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The ability to speak Yiddish without learning it.

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The power to be Rosie O'Donnell.

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The power to inflict Cellulite at touch.

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The power to divide by 0

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The power to walk twice as fast as a guy who walks half the speed you normally have.

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The power to open any door by using the proper key.

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the power of reading your own mind while in a car accident

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The power to make pointless super powers

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The power to smell any point in time

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The ability to kill someone with your mind. But by doing so, you also die.

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The power to move 1 second into the future. Takes 1 second to work.

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x-ray vision but only through glass

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The ability to turn into Barbara Walters

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the owe to sneeze with your eyes open

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The power to grow plants, only using your mind

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The power to let anything you eat taste like sh*t

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anything Aquaman does

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The power to be a man that makes very good sammiches.

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The ability to lose all your limbs on command.

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The power to read the mind of anyone who is having the exact same thought as you.

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the ability to Sh!t while running at full speed

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The power to eat toilet paper and crap self-wiping poop. Think about it...

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!