- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

I have the power to force farts out of my ass.

the ability to make your eyes pop out.

The power to make YouTube subscribers disappear.

The power to telepathically open umbrellas, only open and only umbrellas.

The power to fly whenever you sneeze.

The power to bounce a beach ball with lightly above-average accuracy

the power to turn everything you touch into gold......deja vu?

Have god like powers but only on 30 of february

The power to have intense orgasms, but only if you choke yourself.

The power to piss as if you were in zero gravity and leave your big piss ball floating in the bathroom.

The power to be the most beautiful thing ever unless someone watches you.

the power to travel 1-day into the future by waiting 24 hours

The power to metabolize any radioactive material in your body into arsenic.

The power to have all pointless superpowers, but only on the 12th and or 13th on january on a year that isn't 2015 or lower, but you have to be wearing nothing but purple underwear and a skanky hat.

The ability to turn your fingers into angry bears without you being able to control them

The power to get a cold in the wintertime.

The power to turn everything you touched into gold. A-hem. Midas, you listening?

the power to shrink 0.1 millimeter or grow 0.1 millimeter

The power to know what you would look like if you were ugly.

the power to do a backflip but only if you break your neck in the process

The power to travel in time for 2 seconds

The power to not remember, the only problem, is that you don't remember having this awesome power.

the power to open doors that are unlocked

The power to poop almost instantly, but you always have the runs.

Pointless Super Powers