- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

the power to convert oxygen and glucose to water and carbon dioxide every time you breathe.

The power to smell people's moods

the ability to fly 5 centimeters above ground

The power to let someone control your dick

The power to lick any telephone pole to call somebody in the winter.

The power to jump over mountains but die when you hit the ground.

The power to communicate with dust bunnies.

The power of total invulnerability and immortality, stops working when you get hurt, or die.

The power to elect George W Bush.

The power to produce a hand vacuum from your belly button that only sucks up lint for your belly button

SHAPESHIFT - only into a guinee pig

The power to find your lost keys only if the keys are in your pocket.

Superhuman strength at the expense of being completely paralyzed

the power to hovertate

The power to turn toast back into bread

The power to read your own mind

The ability to go forward in time for 1 second but the process of going forward takes 1 second.

The power to be better than Chuck Norris, but you have to be in a lucid sleep.

to create balloons out of anywhere on your body, and twist them into whatever you look at.

the power to laugh at burials and cry at weddings

The power to turn Justin Bieber into a cat and kill him 9 times

The power to use a ridiculous signature that kills any chance of receving green thumbs. Moral: What you talking bout foo?

The power to turn everything you touched into gold. A-hem. Midas, you listening?

The ability to melt ice slower than it would usually melt

Pointless Super Powers